I Have No Idea Who I Am!
With her head hung low, Carrie (not her real name) walked into the grieving class I was teaching at my church. She sat in total silence for the next hour with tears streaming down her face. After class I pulled her aside and embraced her. In a voice barely audible, she whispered: “I have no idea who I am.”
Obviously, this beautiful young lady had lost the most valuable treasure a person can have–her identity. Something told me this was not the time to give her a preachy sermon on the scriptures of who she was in Christ, and besides that, I did not know whether she was a Christian or not.
I arranged to meet with her the next week, so we could have an in-depth conversation. As our meeting began, I sensed that she was feeling more comfortable with me, so I plunged right in.
“How about we retrace your tracks from the time you were 5-years-old up to the present time to see if we can find where you lost sight of who you are,” I said to her. She agreed, and thus we began.
Me: “Tell me about your life between the ages of 5-10.”
Carrie: “I had a wonderful childhood.”
Me: “Tell me about your life between the ages of 11-14.”
Carrie: “I have wonderful memories with my parents, siblings, and friends.”
Me: “Tell me about your teenage years around the ages of 15-16.”
It was here that Carrie broke into uncontrollable sobs. “I got pregnant at 15, and my parents made me have an abortion. Than at 16, I got pregnant again, and my parents forced me to have another abortion, because they did not want to be embarrassed in front of their family and friends. At 21, I got pregnant again, and this time, I put my foot down.”
I said, “No! I am keeping this baby. The pain of what I have gone through of aborting two babies is unbearable. I trusted you and my doctor when you told me that having an abortion was best for me; now I know that the most trusted people in my life advised me wrong.”
Needlessly to say, we found the place where Carrie had lost her identity–the time of her abortions.
Good News: Carrie and I met weekly for the next year studying a Christian bible study course written especially for women who had had abortions. By the end of that year, Carrie had accepted Jesus Christ as her Savior, forgave herself, and knew who she was in Christ.
Identity Restored! A new life began!
The Bible says: “When someone becomes a Christian, he becomes a brand new person inside. He is not the same anymore. A new life has begun” (2 Corinthians 5:17 TLB).
When we truly understand that we are a brand new person inside, our old labels can be cast aside. It changes the way we think and live. We then are free to pursue a life with purpose with our identity established in Christ.
Reflection
1. Do you sometimes feel as though you do not know who you are? If so, the very first step to take is to confess it. Why not start here today.
2. As Carrie did, retrace your tracks to see where and when you might have lost it. Is it wrapped up in your profession, approval of others, a role you play, or some other way?
3. What does the following scripture mean to you in regards to your identity: When someone becomes a Christian, he becomes a brand new person inside. He is not the same anymore. A new life has begun! (2 Corinthians 5:17 TLB).
Goal Setting & Sharing
List three areas in which you believe God is challenging you to change the perspective you have about yourself. Then earnestly seek Him to see what steps He would have you take to manifest this change.
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