Comparison Culture: Cancel It
Comparison Culture: Cancel It
Cutting Ties with the Cult of Comparison
I’m certain you’ve seen the meme that says, “How girls looked when I was in middle school vs how they look now.” Yeah. I could have been the poster child for that meme. I lived in that “awkward stage” for way too long. I had stringy hair, crooked teeth, huge plastic glasses, and the scrawniest frame you’ve ever seen.
Y’all, I wanted to be everything that I was not. I wanted to be pretty and popular, and shamefully I spent a lot of time upset because I wasn’t. I lived in a constant state of comparison, and that’s not a place I ever want to live again. I looked at other girls’ clothes and wanted them. I looked at other girls’ hair and wanted it – especially my big sisters. I wanted their personality, their athletic ability, their pencil pouch - everything.
I was so focused on everything that I wasn’t, or everything that I didn’t have, that I missed out on everything that I was – and that’s a writer. God specifically tells us in Psalm 139:14 that we are wonderfully made. Did you know that wonderfully means extremely well - in a way that inspires delight? God created us WELL. He created us to inspire delight - to be a light to a dark and fallen world. God gives us scripture to use when battles start brewing in our minds. When that comparison culture starts creeping in, rebuke it in the name of Jesus. I say the above scripture out loud and on purpose as a reminder to myself that God created me to be me.
I spent way too many years comparing instead of bearing. God gives each of us gifts specific to our purpose - to our time. Just ask Esther. Esther, Jewish orphan turned courageous Persian queen, saved her people from being eliminated. What I want you to remember about Esther is that she was just an ordinary girl - in her own eyes that is. But my God loves to use so-called ordinary people to do extraordinary things. Esther couldn’t see this in herself, but luckily Mordecai did. And luckily, she listened to him. Esther 4:14 is a verse I cling to often when I doubt my identity and purpose.
"For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?" (Esther 4:14 NIV)
If we are so focused on comparing ourselves to everyone else, we are going to miss out. Not only will we miss out, but the world will miss out, too.
Like I said, I was well into my 30’s before I realized the true identity that Christ gave me in Him. I hope you don’t wait that long. Looking back I can see when and how He started shaping that identity within me. Once I left the comparison culture behind and started honing in on the specific gifts that God gave me, I was able to truly embrace my calling - spreading God’s message of love to women in need of encouragement.
Dear Created Woman, Stop comparing yourself to everyone else. What God has in store for you is amazing. The world needs you to be who God created you to be - and that’s the truth.
Reflection
1. What aspect of your identity do you struggle with the most?
2. What are three ways that you are unique?
3. What are some ways that you can help others discover their worth and uniqueness?
Goals
Write one step you can take today (at home, at work, with family, etc.) that will help you work on developing your true identity in Christ.
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made, your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” (Psalm 139:14 NIV)